Trainer Confidential - Entry 1: Living Sober - A Personal Account
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This entry is part of the Trainer Confidential series, a behind-the-scenes look at what a trainer like me goes through and how other trainers in similar situations can benefit from and support each other.
“To Alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”
This humorous quote from the end of an early Simpsons episode about Springfield’s previously ignored law of prohibition comes to mind when I think about alcohol. It almost sounds true, especially when thinking about my twenties. You feel stressed from school, work, or life, and finding a drink (or two) is the best solution. When you go to parties, you can’t help but take a few sips of beer or jungle juice, even if a sip means “shotgunning” a can. Of course, there were consequences to those actions (search “Walk of Shame”). There was just one problem:
I don’t consume alcohol.
Well, at least for now. There’s no tragic story as to why I don’t. I had a couple of family members who drank a lot, but they were very distant. It never appealed to me. Maybe it was because the friends I know and love become different people when inebriated and I didn’t want to see that side of them. Or the fear of myself getting drunk and doing something stupid gave me that mindset. Even when I did, I kept it simple: a maximum of two bottles of beer or a single one and a cocktail. Coke and Jack or Bacardi was my go-to. I have never smoked or taken drugs, but I always felt that alcohol was the only way to be social, and that was what held me back, or at least I thought. Back then, only a few occasions called for consumption, including birthdays, graduations, and gatherings like class reunions.
Ever since my Freshman Year of college, people knew that I would not drink until I turned 21, which also meant some people wouldn’t invite me to go out so I wouldn’t “get in trouble.” I also felt like becoming “shitfaced” and drinking some “liquid courage” were prerequisites for talking with friends or that girl I liked. It was part of the culture that I still struggle with. There was one instance a few years ago at a charity event where an acquaintance from high school offered to buy a drink for me. As kind as it was, I had to reject it because I knew my limits. He then just walked away like he was insulted. Now, should I have accepted the drink? Probably. But it made me even more insecure about my choices and going out with others. It also didn’t help when people told me that “alcohol never killed anyone.” I hated it when people said that.
As I grew older, I read and heard about celebrities and former alcoholics and drug users in my circles who stopped drinking, smoking, and taking drugs to live a better life. I respect that so much that back in March, I started to see how long I could go without alcohol. I knew people who went through 75 Hard, a program designed by health entrepreneur Andy Frisella. One of the guidelines is “no alcohol,” which piqued my attention. Seeing other people who wanted to improve their lives by abiding by those program’s rules made me more comfortable doing the same. Now, I have never participated in the program (by the way, there is a more relaxed version called 75 Soft). However, I have adopted some of the rules in my life, including no alcohol. I think I have the physical activity portion down!
I am almost a year in, with my last drink with a significant amount of alcohol (I had a non-alcoholic beer a couple of weeks ago) consumed back in March, ironically at a fitness conference. I have attended some networking events lately and not one drip. It’s either water or ginger ale. I do not have a set end date, but I want to see how long I can go. It helps that I am with people who have decreased consumption or got rid of it entirely. I felt that has helped. The most important thing for me is to worry less about what others think of your choices. If they don’t want to hang out because of your decision, that’s their problem. Be with people who care and enjoy your company, regardless of what you consume. You would be surprised to see how many people, especially around my age, don’t drink or are occasional drinkers.
So, why am I telling you this now? This is something I have wanted to talk about for a while. It took me this long because I feared being perceived as a “drama king.” Meaning that people thought I needed attention, and writing something like this would make them feel sorry for me. Comments like that in middle school prevented me from telling my story. I want to let others in similar situations know they are not alone and that a whole group went through it. Now, I’m not afraid of telling my story.
As a trainer, I will never force you not to drink alcohol. I understand that a glass of wine once in a while is acceptable. But I would also welcome anyone who wants to pursue an alcohol-less lifestyle. Dry January may be over, but why stop there? Many non-alcohol bars are opening up, and the number of non-alcoholic beers is increasing. Mock-tails would be another alternative. The journey to becoming more comfortable with this lifestyle is promising, and from what it looks like, it’s not stopping anytime soon.
Feel free to comment or message me if you have any questions or are on a similar journey as me.
